That's when I reach for my vinaigrette
Billmon is a genius, but he's got this one wrong:
Another conservative speaker was hit with a pie ... in this case, Dave "the Chairman" Horowitz, who was creamed while agitating the academic masses at Butler University ...Wrong. Let the wingnuts scream from here till kingdom come about their free speech rights being stifled, I don't give a shit. They'll scream about it anyway. We have to realize that their complaints only occasionally and accidentally correspond to reality, and that this is of absolutely no concern to them. They will call us Nazis and terrorists and traitors no matter how nice we play.
This continues a recent string of drive-by foodstuffings by disgruntled liberal students, who apparently are studying for their Bachelor of Infantile Behavior degrees -- and acing all their courses, I might add. I think the one who nailed Horowitz was majoring in lemon merengue, with a minor in smearing apple sauce all over his high chair.
I have to confess, part of me found this new campus fad mildly amusing at first -- and even weirdly appropriate, given our increasingly absurd culture. (What's a clown show without a good pie fight?) But it's getting out of hand. The wing nuts are starting to spin on their screwbolts again, ranting about leftist hatemongers and liberal thuggery and (you know it's only a matter of time) "pie-throwing terrorists."...this time the wing nuts are right -- although, as usual, they've got the volume turned up about ten clicks beyond the point where human ears begin to bleed.
In a civilized society, you don't physically harass or attack people for exercising their free speech rights, even if they are the vile scumsucking lackeys of crazed right-wing multimillionaires -- or even worse, David Horowitz. You just don't do it ...
In a civilized society, you don't listen quietly to demons like Buchanan and Horowitz spewing their madness, waiting politely for your chance to rebut like it's a high school debate team match. The very act of engaging them in discourse lends them a legitimacy that they haven't earned; it is unconscionable to allow them to present themselves to society as rational human beings with opinions and beliefs and arguments when they are not. They are not just people we disagree with, for the sake of fuck. They are not playing our game--they are not making a good-faith effort to make sense of the world and do what they can to make things better--and we shouldn't pretend that they are.
Rather, we should make clear what they are really doing by doing the same thing--by playing their game, if only temporarily. By acting like they do: as if guided solely and absolutely by insanity and rage and the blind need to stain the world with oneself by any means necessary.
Horowitz isn't a person; he's a ridiculous hallucination, an evil spirit that thrives on our refusal to call him what he is. And the same goes for Buchanan and the rest of the wolf pack. Ridiculous buffoons all of them; treating them any other way is immoral and stupid.
Give me a choice, and I'll take a dreadlocked Marxist college student dousing Buchanan with salad dressing over Paul Begala sitting down and debating him any fucking day of the week. At least one of them hasn't sold his soul to the devil yet. At least one of them is calling a spade a spade.
Fuck the CNN kabuki circle-jerk where we sit down like we are all adults and talk things out, foolishly believing that since our arguments are better, that since we have reason and truth on our side, that this is in our interests. Give me the sheer honesty of smearing condiments on these jackasses' Brooks Brothers suits. Give me the perfect absurdity of a pie in a clown's face.
Whatever you do, don't treat irrationality as rationality; don't treat insanity as sanity. And if flinging shit is the only way to expose the lie that says that the chimpanzee screechings of these fucktards are actually attempts at rational discourse, then so be it.